on my ride home today

Had a fantastic day today. I was helping someone do some carpentry and put up some siding, the day just seemed to fly by. On my way home I noticed an overwhelming sense of calm coming over me. Not a common occurrence when traveling south on I 295 at rush hour. I got out of the left lane and just paced traffic the rest of the way home not really understanding what the feeling was.

I think it came from doing "real work", something that I haven't done that often in a long time. I'm not sure about anyone else but I get a great deal of satisfaction from physically and mentally demanding tasks. It's very similar to the runners high I used to get from the longer runs I did while in the Army. It's always difficult to get started in the morning but after a while your brain settles into a nice groove and time seems to disappear.

I used to get this feeling from many things, mountain biking, hiking, just being in the woods by myself and from good concerts. All things that seem to loose their place in your priorities when you have small children. My children make me very happen, they are a true joy to behold. There is nothing quite like seeing the world again though the eyes of your kids. I am also lucky to have an absolutely wonderful wife, caring and organized she is definitely the engine that drives my life. But this feeling of complete calm is something very rare for me these days, It's hard for me to achieve without solitude.

I still like doing things with my family and small groups of friends but at my core I think I have always been a very solitary person. I have a real need to be alone at times, something that my wife has grown to except and graciously affords me when it is possible. Without this I grow distant and the easy going person most know disappears and is replace by someone that is brooding and quick to agitate.

Anyway, that is what the euphoric feeling I had today on my ride home made me think about. Now, back to Spongebob and the two kids that think daddy has had enough alone time today.

Peace